Worst in me

It’s one of those many dark nights,
I talk about over and over,
With all the pain and sighs,
Not forgetting the tormenting fears,
It’s one of those dark nights,
I go back and flow my tears,
And take a pen and a paper and create a new flow.

It’s one of those dark nights,
I let my demons wonder about,
One of those dark nights
I let my blood bleed,
Oozing so freely,
On my willing paper.
It’s one of those dark nights,
I trod down memory lane,
And wish I had done things better.

It’s one of those dark nights,
I hear her voice,
“Mama?”
Oh, baby Love don’t torture me,
What mamma did was wrong,
Mama would have done better,
Mama should have done better,
Mamma let you down.
Baby Love, please forgive me.

It was a crime of passion.
He held me till blood rushed in my veins,
I could feel my pulse escalate,
I could feel my urge,
Stronger by the second,
His lips caressed mine,
His hand wandered on my body,
Like he was looking at the Eiffel tower,
His eyes blinded by passion,
I let myself free,
I wanted it, no doubt,
I wanted to have something good for myself.

Days later the news came in,
I had you in me,
Eating what I ate,
I was losing my figure 8,
But I liked it
You are a product of our passion.
Then reality dawned on me,
With a rude awakening,
I couldn’t have you,
I had to,
It was tough,
It was painful,
But what hurts even more are the thoughts of what could have been.
So forgive me, Baby Love
Coz mama let you down.

I should have done better.
My conscience is killing me,
I should have done better,
but time had run out,
Now I sit in the nights,
My eyes sore from the tears,
sing you a lullaby,
Go to sleep, my baby,
Go to sleep little one,
And I hope that someday I will see you,
That one day, you will forgive me.

©feddiesharkhy