Onward

Onward

It’s on a Thursday at 9:36 pm. I have been yawning from 8:00 pm…not hungry, just tired after a long week that seems to even drag towards the end. It is one of those days that I ponder on a lot about me, the far I have come, the far I hope to go, self-made losses, unpreventable back lags, life problems and wins in general.

Growing up, I pictured 24 as the age full of freedom and milestones in life. At this time of the year, I pictured myself getting done with college and eventually landing on one of my a million dream jobs, paying my bills with ease, and just being happy about life.

Am happy, except that a lot has changed in 2020 with many things coming to an unprecedented halt. Companies have shut down, people have lost jobs, schools have closed, teenage pregnancies riding at its peak….a lot happening at the same time.

I had a lot lined up for this year including purchasing reliable equipment for my starting company, but 2020, has had its fair share of power over plans.

At 24, I have found a preference in going straight back home every evening and finding peace in my square after a long day full of noise from hooting vehicles and shouting ‘manambas’.Yeah, I found something to hold onto meanwhile as I wait for school resumptions.

I still haven’t given up on my dreams. Am pushing harder each day, hoping that one day I will look back and be more proud of whom I have become.

At 24, life has taught me a lot about human behavior. Among the lessons, I have learnt that one can miss out on job slots, not because they are not qualified, but because they are beautiful and uphold their standards.

I have learnt that one can’t always find favor in the eyes of everyone. The bigger the circle one creates, the more the enemies one gets to have as well for actually no apparent reasons.

I have learnt that you are better off having yourself 1st as your source of motivation before any other, believing in your dream, and evaluating oneself as often as possible.

At 24, I have discovered that one is happier and at peace not minding other people’s business and learning to embrace both life and people the way they are. One is better off accepting peacefully what is not working in life and embracing an option that will work.

It is in this very age and year that I have discovered that education is something, but not everything one needs to maneuver through life, especially with the changing times.

We grow up and it reaches a point we either take it up as our solemn responsibilities to toughen up or blame life for every single happening.

I stayed at home for a while and felt like I was suffocating in the square. Life had put me with things not moving forward as fast as they used to, and every single time I brainstormed on the fact that when a day is gone, it’s gone and life won’t stop at anything to consider that a given period in your life was hindered by unavoidable circumstances.

The ticking sound of the clock gets even louder as one grows and you realize that you only have this one life to make the best out of it or be comfortable with where one is.

2020 has affected a whole year’s plan. It’s a matter of working on an emergency strategy until lost time can be recovered fully. It’s in this box of pressure that we can discover who we can be.

Oops! Its 11:25 pm got a few hours to catch some sleep before my alarm welcomes me to yet another day.